Friday, June 26, 2009
So yesterday was pretty interesting. We lost Michael Jackson, and that sucks. I know he was somewhat weird towards the end of his career, but the guy was never convicted of anything he was accused of, and I'm willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. He is the greatest entertainer to ever walk the planet. Would you rather see a Beatles concert or the Thriller tour? That's what I thought...
So today I rocked some classic MJ on the way to teach summer school at Lehi High School. I'm teaching my students how to utilize word choice in their writing. I showed them the Thriller music video (yes the whole thing...so freaking classic) and then had them write it as a story with interesting descriptions of what was happening. I didn't want: The zombies danced... I wanted: The living dead lurched forward in rhythm as their putrid corpses shed old skin and organs on the cold pavement.
It went over well and the students dug it. They are a totally different generation, I don't think they really got the coolness of the Thriller.
So I dedicate today to you Michael Jackson. Despite what the public says, you gave MILLIONS to charity, you entertained, and you had a rough life. God Bless you.
In other words, I sat through 2 hours and 45 minutes of Transformers 2 last night...my dreams of a great sequel were blown up in my face. Were the action scenes incredible? Yes, yes they were. But did those scenes make sitting through dogs humping, transformers humping, men in thongs, and terribly conceived plot twists and such? No
Will it look great on Blu ray? Yes, some parts will, but I left that theater with no desire for them to make a third one. I'm the black sheep I guess cause all of my family and friends thought the action was so great that it totally outshined the lame factor. I can't agree with that. Darth Maul was cool enough to out shine Jar Jar's ineptitude, but when a transformer goes at it on the fox girls' leg for 10 seconds, there is just no saving the movie. 1 star for great action. -5 stars for robot on human leg action- JR
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
I'm a home grown American citizen, 53, registered Democrat all my life. Before the last presidential election I registered as a Republican because I no longer felt the Democratic Party represents my views or works to pursue issues important to me. Now I no longer feel the Republican Party represents my views or works to pursue issues important to me. The fact is I no longer feel any political party or representative in Washington represents my views or works to pursue the issues important to me. There must be someone. Please tell me who you are. Please stand up and tell me that you are there and that you're willing to fight for our Constitution as it was written. Please stand up now. You might ask yourself what my views and issues are that I would horribly feel so disenfranchised by both major political parties. What kind of nut job am I? Will you please tell me?
Well, these are briefly my views and issues for which I seek representation:
One, illegal immigration. I want you to stop coddling illegal immigrants and secure our borders. Close the underground tunnels. Stop the violence and the trafficking in drugs and people. No amnesty, not again. Been there, done that, no resolution. P.S., I'm not a racist. This isn't to be confused with legal immigration.
Glenn Beck's Common Sense
Now available in book stores nationwide...
Two, the TARP bill, I want it repealed and I want no further funding supplied to it. We told you no, but you did it anyway. I want the remaining unfunded 95% repealed. Freeze, repeal.
Three: Czars, I want the circumvention of our checks and balances stopped immediately. Fire the czars. No more czars. Government officials answer to the process, not to the president. Stop trampling on our Constitution and honor it.
Four, cap and trade. The debate on global warming is not over. There is more to say.
Five, universal healthcare. I will not be rushed into another expensive decision. Don't you dare try to pass this in the middle of the night and then go on break. Slow down!
Six, growing government control. I want states rights and sovereignty fully restored. I want less government in my life, not more. Shrink it down. Mind your own business. You have enough to take care of with your real obligations. Why don't you start there.
Seven, ACORN. I do not want ACORN and its affiliates in charge of our 2010 census. I want them investigated. I also do not want mandatory escrow fees contributed to them every time on every real estate deal that closes. Stop the funding to ACORN and its affiliates pending impartial audits and investigations. I do not trust them with taking the census over with our taxpayer money. I don't trust them with our taxpayer money. Face up to the allegations against them and get it resolved before taxpayers get any more involved with them. If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck, hello. Stop protecting your political buddies. You work for us, the people. Investigate.
Eight, redistribution of wealth. No, no, no. I work for my money. It is mine. I have always worked for people with more money than I have because they gave me jobs. That is the only redistribution of wealth that I will support. I never got a job from a poor person. Why do you want me to hate my employers? Why ‑‑ what do you have against shareholders making a profit?
Nine, charitable contributions. Although I never got a job from a poor person, I have helped many in need. Charity belongs in our local communities, where we know our needs best and can use our local talent and our local resources. Butt out, please. We want to do it ourselves.
Ten, corporate bailouts. Knock it off. Sink or swim like the rest of us. If there are hard times ahead, we'll be better off just getting into it and letting the strong survive. Quick and painful. Have you ever ripped off a Band‑Aid? We will pull together. Great things happen in America under great hardship. Give us the chance to innovate. We cannot disappoint you more than you have disappointed us.
Eleven, transparency and accountability. How about it? No, really, how about it? Let's have it. Let's say we give the buzzwords a rest and have some straight honest talk. Please try ‑‑ please stop manipulating and trying to appease me with clever wording. I am not the idiot you obviously take me for. Stop sneaking around and meeting in back rooms making deals with your friends. It will only be a prelude to your criminal investigation. Stop hiding things from me.
Twelve, unprecedented quick spending. Stop it now.
Take a breath. Listen to the people. Let's just slow down and get some input from some nonpoliticians on the subject. Stop making everything an emergency. Stop speed reading our bills into law. I am not an activist. I am not a community organizer. Nor am I a terrorist, a militant or a violent person. I am a parent and a grandparent. I work. I'm busy. I'm busy. I am busy, and I am tired. I thought we elected competent people to take care of the business of government so that we could work, raise our families, pay our bills, have a little recreation, complain about taxes, endure our hardships, pursue our personal goals, cut our lawn, wash our cars on the weekends and be responsible contributing members of society and teach our children to be the same all while living in the home of the free and land of the brave.
I entrusted you with upholding the Constitution. I believed in the checks and balances to keep from getting far off course. What happened? You are very far off course. Do you really think I find humor in the hiring of a speed reader to unintelligently ramble all through a bill that you signed into law without knowing what it contained? I do not. It is a mockery of the responsibility I have entrusted to you. It is a slap in the face. I am not laughing at your arrogance. Why is it that I feel as if you would not trust me to make a single decision about my own life and how I would live it but you should expect that I should trust you with the debt that you have laid on all of us and our children. We did not want the TARP bill. We said no. We would repeal it if we could. I am sure that we still cannot. There is such urgency and recklessness in all of the recent spending.
From my perspective, it seems that all of you have gone insane. I also know that I am far from alone in these feelings. Do you honestly feel that your current pursuits have merit to patriotic Americans? We want it to stop. We want to put the brakes on everything that is being rushed by us and forced upon us. We want our voice back. You have forced us to put our lives on hold to straighten out the mess that you are making. We will have to give up our vacations, our time spent with our children, any relaxation time we may have had and money we cannot afford to spend on you to bring our concerns to Washington. Our president often knows all the right buzzword is unsustainable. Well, no kidding. How many tens of thousands of dollars did the focus group cost to come up with that word? We don't want your overpriced words. Stop treating us like we're morons.
We want all of you to stop focusing on your reelection and do the job we want done, not the job you want done or the job your party wants done. You work for us and at this rate I guarantee you not for long because we are coming. We will be heard and we will be represented. You think we're so busy with our lives that we will never come for you? We are the formerly silent majority, all of us who quietly work , pay taxes, obey the law, vote, save money, keep our noses to the grindstone and we are now looking up at you. You have awakened us, the patriotic spirit so strong and so powerful that it had been sleeping too long. You have pushed us too far. Our numbers are great. They may surprise you. For every one of us who will be there, there will be hundreds more that could not come. Unlike you, we have their trust. We will represent them honestly, rest assured. They will be at the polls on voting day to usher you out of office. We have cancelled vacations. We will use our last few dollars saved. We will find the representation among us and a grassroots campaign will flourish. We didn't ask for this fight. But the gloves are coming off. We do not come in violence, but we are angry. You will represent us or you will be replaced with someone who will. There are candidates among us when hewill rise like a Phoenix from the ashes that you have made of our constitution.
Democrat, Republican, independent, libertarian. Understand this. We don't care. Political parties are meaningless to us. Patriotic Americans are willing to do right by us and our Constitution and that is all that matters to us now. We are going to fire all of you who abuse power and seek more. It is not your power. It is ours and we want it back. We entrusted you with it and you abused it. You are dishonorable. You are dishonest. As Americans we are ashamed of you. You have brought shame to us. If you are not representing the wants and needs of your constituency loudly and consistently, in spite of the objections of your party, you will be fired. Did you hear? We no longer care about your political parties. You need to be loyal to us, not to them. Because we will get you fired and they will not save you. If you do or can represent me, my issues, my views, please stand up. Make your identity known. You need to make some noise about it. Speak up. I need to know who you are. If you do not speak up, you will be herded out with the rest of the sheep and we will replace the whole damn congress if need be one by one. We are coming. Are we coming for you? Who do you represent? What do you represent? Listen. Because we are coming. We the people are coming.
Saturday, June 13, 2009
So I blog fairly often about my love for movies. I'd like to stop for a moment and talk about "films." But wait Justin, aren't films and movies the same thing? Well sorta, but then again a Big Mac and a Whopper are both Cheeseburgers...which cause intestinal problems...but they taste different.
So this week I went and grabbed a couple of really good films, Namely: Psycho (the Original) and The Birds. Both of these are Hitchcock films and both are amazingly cool. For those of you who need an example of the difference between a movie and a film, let's look at Disturbia vs. Rear Window (yet another Hitchcock film).
They both have the exact same plot, (I hear that Disturbia got sued over it actually) a person sits in their house with a telescope and become really paranoid of their neighbor whom they suspect of murder most foul.
The big difference is that Disturbia is more "in your face" and blunt. Rear window is a masterpiece in suspenseful film making. It leaves you guessing til the last frame.
There are moments in movies that give me goosebumps and most of them are in older movies. These aren't fear goosebumps, these are "oh my gosh this is crazy cool" goosebumps.
1. Raiders of the Lost Ark: "It's beautiful"- then the angel turns into a screaming ghost skeleton and the Nazi's melt
2. Jaws: Quint's speech about the USS Indianapolis
3. Psycho: We finally meet Mrs. Bates...holy crap I almost had to change my shorts
The list goes on of course, but yeah, Hitchcock and Spielberg are the masters of making good movies.
IF YOU HAVE NOT SEEN THE ORIGINAL PSYCHO, COME BORROW IT, GO RENT IT, JUST SEE IT!!!
Anywho, yes, if you've seen a good film (not a cool movie) that you think others should see, then message me and I'll post them.
Run Lola Run
Gran Torino (if you can find a language edited one that's best)
Letters from Iwo Jima
Flags of Our Fathers
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Chuck & Lester’s Fables
The Duck and the Land Mine:
Once there was a duck name Wendell. He was a mallard duck, which meant that his head was a greenish hue. It looked kind of like boiled spinach. One day he decided to fly to a new pond, since his old pond was starting to become stale and unpopular according to some new wave magazine. On the way to the new pond he stopped to waddle in a field, as ducks are wont to do. Three steps after he landed, he stepped on a land mine and blew up. Thus is life…Think about it. What is YOUR conclusion?
The Elephant and the Porcelain Tree
Once there was an elephant named Wendell. He was named after a famous duck who had given his life in the pursuit of being “fresh.” Wendell the elephant loved to play tricks on other animals by filling his trunk with water and then spraying them at inopportune moments. He also liked to charge tourists and make them wet themselves. His goal was to make it on a clip on one of those attacking animals shows that gets played over and over on cable TV. One day, he was charging a tourist who was off exploring on his own. The tourist moved out of the way and Wendell the elephant ran head on into a porcelain tree. Thus is life…Think about it. What is YOUR conclusion?
The Rattlesnake and Boy Scout Troop 1632
Once there was a snake named Wen….named Rufus. Not a very good name for a snake is it? Well Rufus was slithering down a path when he came upon a camp of boy scouts. They were all dressed in their tan shirts, green shorts, scarves, and loooong socks. Knowing full well that boy scouts loved and respected nature; Rufus decided to make himself known to the boys by rattling. He figured that they would try to identify him with their field guides and take pictures of him with their poorly assembled disposable cameras. After 30 seconds of rattling he noticed the boys were looking in his direction. Rufus was excited to get showered with attention as the boys approached. Suddenly, the reddest haired and portliest of the boys took out a shovel and crushed Rufus’ skull. Things went dark pretty quickly after the initial hit. Thus is life…Think about it. What is YOUR conclusion?
The Humming Bird and the Tennis Match
Once there was a humming bird named Jerry. He was proud to be a member of the most ADD animal species in the entire animal kingdom. He liked to go to parks, no wait this park is boring, now he liked to go to post offices, no their stamps are getting too pricey, now he liked to go to shopping centers….You get the point right? Jerry can’t stay still. His wings beat at over 200 flaps a minute. 300 if he was fast enough to sneak some coffee from an unsuspecting Flemish painter. One day he saw a curious yellow orb, and he decided to investigate. Upon further inspection he saw that there were many of these yellow orbs flying back and forth in a big green rectangle. Jerry decided to zip in closer and suck the nectar out of one of these yellow orbs when suddenly his life came to an end as someone yelled out, “Fourty Love!” Jerry didn’t feel the love, he felt a racket. Thus is life…Think about it. What is YOUR conclusion?
The Bloated Cow and the Scorpion
Once there was a cow named Dennis. He died of a nasty infection and lay still for about a week in a field near
The Whale and the Frenchman’s Yacht
Once there was a blue whale named Bernard. One day while swimming naked through the ocean, he spotted the underbelly of a yacht. Twas a Frenchman’s yacht. Well Bernard stopped inhaling the bounteous buffet of microscopic ocean life forms and went to investigate. As he neared the vessel he could hear drunken singing and the sound of an out of tune lute. Bernard quietly surfaced 20 yards a starboard of the Frenchman’s Yacht. He observed a man on his boat, eating croissants and fiddling with an unopened box of whine, whilst a rather large woman of Indian descent danced a jig. The whole scene infuriated Bernard for reasons that Triton himself can not fathom, and spurred him into a violent rage. He lifted his tail high into the air and then smashed it downwards towards the keel as he heard the words, “Mon Diu!” shouted in fear. The boat was rent in two, and the crew left unconscious in the unforgiving sea. Bernard noticed moments later that a plank in the boat had pierced his tail. This wound eventually led his tail becoming gimpy, which hindered Bernard’s escape from a whaling boat he ran into a week later. Thus is life…Think about it. What is YOUR conclusion?
The Chicken and the Homeless “Goat”
Once there was a chicken aptly named, “Clucky.” She lived on a farm in central
The Cricket and the Hammer
Once there was a cricket named Louis. He prided himself on the fact that when all was quiet at night, and people were sleeping peacefully through the sound of other crickets, he could pipe up and make a cricketing chirping noise so loud, that entire neighborhoods would wake up and search their bushes for the obnoxiously loud perpetrator. One night he found an open window and he leapt in. He found himself in a garage with EXCELLENT acoustics. He figured he’d have enough reverberation to make the entire town think that this guy’s garage was making noise, and they hunt him down and kill him! Well about 4 seconds into his chirping declaration to the town, he realized that the owner of the garage was standing there with a large hammer. The man swung the hammer down and….missed Louis. Louis had jumped out of the way of the fatal blow just in the nick of time. Unfortunately though, Louis landed in an open container of gasoline. As his skin burned and his senses went wild with confusion, helplessness, and fear, his last clear thought was of wishing that he’d gone the way of the hammer. Thus is life…Think about it. What is YOUR conclusion?
The Snail and the Turtle
Once there was a snail named Kevin, who lived near a forest. He had always lived near the forest, because he was a snail, and snails don’t tend to live in too many different biomes. One day he met a turtle named Victor who was paaaaaaassssssssssiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnggggggggg byyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy. Victor said, “hello there snail, how are you doing on this fine afternoon?” Kevin replied, “very well thank you, but I’m awfully bored. There’s so much of the world to see and I’m too slow to go anywhere amazing!” Victor looked at him for a minute…which stretched into an hour…and finally about a day later he said, “Hop on little buddy.” Kevin cliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiimbed up to the top of Victor’s shell and off they went. Kevin said, “weeeeeeeeeeee!” Thus is life…Think about it. What is YOUR conclusion?
The Fisherman and the Other Fisherman
Once there was a fisherman, fishing for fish in fish river. 30 yards down stream there was this other fisherman, fishing for fish in fish river. One yelled to the other, “what are you using for bait on this hot summer’s day in June? The other yelled back, “Watch out for that angry territorial Moose!” While one fisherman was brutally attacked by a large moose, the other thought to himself, “thank goodness I bated my hooks with REAL squirrel meat.” He then hopped back into his canoe and traveled farther down fish river. Thus is life…Think about it. What is YOUR conclusion?
The Clown and the Swarm of Vegetarian Piranhas
Once there was a clown with no name, because clown names aren’t funny. He was trying to make his way to a local birthday party when he was faced with the chore of crossing the mighty
The Ground Hog and the Lawn Mower
One morning a groundhog woke up to the most curious sound. It seemed to come close to his burrow and then move away, and then come back again. He poked his head up to see what the sound could possibly be coming from and…Thus is life…Think about it. What is YOUR conclusion?
The Possum and the Tree
Once there was a Possum named Terrance. He just loved to climb trees and hang upside down all day long. One day he found himself roughly 5 feet above the ground in an elm tree at the far end of the forest. He awoke to the sound of children shouting in Spanish. He froze as he realized that he was surrounded by roughly a dozen of these young Latino children. One of the children was walking off balance and the others laughed at him. He wore blue jeans, a red button up shirt, and a white handkerchief around his eyes. Terrance realized too late that “Luis” was holding a bat. Before he could yell out, “I’m not full of Candy!” It was over: Thus is life…Think about it. What is YOUR conclusion?
The Old Lady and the Birds
Miss Loretta had lived a long life full of family, friends, and adventure. Now she reflected on those days as she sat and fed bread to the birds. She would walk by the baker’s store every Saturday evening and pick up a loaf of whatever hadn’t sold that day. On this particular Sunday morning she found herself walking to the park with a bag of jalapeño bread. She took her usual seat at the park bench, breathed in the morning air, and started tearing off small pieces of the loaf and throwing them a few feet in front of her. At first there was one bird…then two…then 5…then a whole flock of them. They devoured the bread in minutes and then turned to her with longing in their eyes. Miss Loretta reached into her purse, pulled out a tazer, and took out as many birds as she could before the battery ran out. Thus is life…Think about it. What is YOUR conclusion?
The Old Man and the Bucket of Popcorn
There once was an old man named Pete. He liked to sit out in the heat. He always brought his faaaavorite treat to eat in the heat. Was it meat? Noooooo. Juice of a beet? Noooooo. It was popcorn. Pete loved popcorn. And though the rhyme scheme has been thrown off, we shall continue with his story. Pete was walking down a path of stone one day when he reached into his popcorn tub and his hand hit the bottom. “I’m all out of popcorn,” said Pete. Just then the Sherriff appeared and took Pete into custody for violating his parole. Thus is life…Think about it. What is YOUR conclusion?
Scotsman and the Big Red Button
Once there was a Scotsman whose beard was as red as a freshly cut trout. His name was not important, for the villagers all called him simply, “Big Red.” He lived in the hills and appeared every Thursday to bring his sheep to market. Nobody really ate sheep any more, but they would buy them out of pity so as to keep “Big Red’s” spirits up. Because man must move forward in life, the town soon had a nuclear power plant with which to power their many electronic devices. Big Red was asked to come be the special guest on opening day. He would be the one to push the big red button and get the plant started off. On the way to the ceremony: Big Red was trampled by a herd of wild sheep who were trying to free their imprisoned brethren. Thus is life…Think about it. What is YOUR conclusion?
Monday, June 8, 2009
Last week school got out:
Saturday I can't even recall
Sunday: Church and helped Kathy move in Salt Lake
Monday: Helped Whitney move in Salt Lake, worked late
Tuesday: Worked all day and got news that I have yet another job (that's 3 this summer)
Wed: Worked job A in the morning, and job B at night
Thursday: Worked job C in the morning and job A at night
Friday: Finally a day off...didn't feel the blogging though
Saturday: Saw Land of the Lost, laughed out loud many times. Cousins and family over for games that night. Rocked some scene it.
Sunday: First restful Sunday in a LOOONG time. Napped like a king
This brings us to Today: THE DENTIST!
Now many of us fear the dentist for different reasons. Of course the drilling sucks, but today my fear came from the fact that I have not been to a dentist since...I BELIEVE 2004. Possibly even 2003. So the x-rays were taken...and...and...and I'll tell you about that in a minute. First off an observation:
You know how in the fast pace of a conversation you sometimes blurt something out that you didn't really think through and you feel stupid? Well the dentist is a great time for great conversation. Sounds weird I know since he has his or her hand in your mouth the whole time. But I found that while they are doing their thing, they talk and talk, and you can sit there and make rough drafts and final drafts of your response which you spring on them when they take a break to get more cleaning stuff or a new tool.
I felt like the king of high speech as she would clean and talk talk talk, and then I would reply with this amazingly refined poetic answer. I know I know, it's amazing she didn't pass out and fall because of my dizzying intellect right?
So after all of this marvelous conversation, the Dentist walks in to "look at my x-rays."
I was sweating bullets and moving uncomfortably in the chair (which may or may not have resulted in a "rubbing leather" noise...oops)
I heard mouth terms being thrown around about 4th meta somethings and bi-something elses. I of course was expecting high single digits, maybe lower double digits for fillings. This coming from a guy who regularly eats a large bowl of captain crunch filled with butterfinger bars. I brush often but my flossing is LESS than marvelous. I try every week to swear off soda but then require a sugary mountain dew to get me through a long night teaching at the academy. (The discovery academy...sadly not the Jedi Academy, that would be wicked)
(And yes that's me in my picture...how did I ever get married)
So anyways, I have you in suspense now. You know it's been 5+ years since my last examintation, I consume foods that most dentists probably consider swear words, and I never find the time to thoroughly floss...
"Well no cavities but one of your fillings needs to be replaced...."
That's right...ONE! If I may quote the last message a student wrote on my board this year: Mr. Reeves is so Hella Fly....- OUT!