Thursday, October 29, 2009

Halloween...

"And so, my tender lumplings, let my welcome hear you now
Into our flesh-pink home of hearts, we greet you with a bow
So entertain we must (We may!) our pleasure from within
The Oingo Boingo treasure chest of lust and mortal sin
We'll take you to a place you'd like to visit least of all
Where great-great aunts and uncles died and worms and spiders crawl
The graveyard is a peaceful place where people tread about
But late at night the tenants leave their rooms to sing and shout
So take heed, brothers, the full moon grows
And may the good Lord save your souls!"- Danny Elfman- Oingo Boingo



I love this Holiday. A chance to watch scary movies that aren't actually scary. A chance to dress like a fool...a ruse of fool...a chance to scream at the moon and terrify one another. Bless this most hallowed of eves...bless it. - out

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

80's ROCKED, This generation is LAME


A friend and I were pondering 80's breakfast cereals during our break today...
What?
Serious?
Yes, it's true. We googled images of long forgotten breakfast cereals. We discussed classic 80's cartoons, and the fact that this generation has totally missed out on good stuff.

Let's use Cartoons as an example:

GI JOE
Transformers
He-man
Voltron
Thunder thunder thunder thunder cats HOOOOOOOO!
Ghostbusters
Eek the Cat
Bobby's World (don't ya know)
X-men
Batman
Tazmania
Loony Tunes
Duck Tales
Chip n Dale's rescue rangers.

I could go on and on with this list of incredibly cool cartoons.




What do we see when we turn the tv on now?
Pokemon
Yugio
and a bunch of other LAME Japanese wannabe shows where instead of defending Eternia or Thundera, people throw playing cards at each other with monsters on them....
seriously what the heck?
"Pikachu I choose you! to fight my battles because I'm too much of a wuss to jump into a Vultron vehicle and do it myself"

When I used to get cereal, there were PRIZES in the cereal. Magic Tricks. Baseball cards, action figures, cool spoons, etc. Now a days "If you collect 4 upc codes and mail them in with shipping costs, we'll send you a Hannah Montana dvd!!!"

LAME LAME LAME!




I say take me back to the day with Ninja Turtle Pies (remember, those hostess pies that had green Vanilla filling? eh? THAT WAS CLASSIC)



I hung a poster of Jacob next to Edward from twilight in my classroom today. I put up captions next to them saying, "Duck Season" "Wabbit Season" "Duck Season" "Wabbit Season"

My students didn't get the joke...How...sad...is that- out

Monday, October 5, 2009

Solved the Energy Crisis!

So tonight my class and I were talking about how Oil is a limited resource and it supposedly hurts the environment. I keep hearing President Obama say, "wind power wind power wind power" but I don't think he realizes that my car doesn't have a sail like the Black Pearl. Mine runs on gasoline. Beautiful, Polar Bear Killing, Gasoline. We discussed how the fishing industry was as big as the present day oil industry. We lit our lanterns with oil from whales back in the day you know. This got us thinking- hmmmm milk from cows = renewable resource. Oil from ground = NOT renewable resouce. What if we could find a way to tap whales so that they produced oil from a tube in their heads that we could harness and yet at the same time, leave the whales alive to continue producing! GEEEEEENIUS!




Sure maybe when you grab the nozzle to fill up your car you hear a whale moaning sound, but hey! It's not going to run out any time soon right? I mean we eat burgers from McDonalds, we eat Chickens from KFC, we eat whatever the heck it is that Taco Bell uses too right? I'm going to start a campaign. This is going to get me straight to the White House. It's even better than my "Nuke the Moon" idea. Sometimes it hurts to be this smart ladies and gentlemen...sometimes.